“My mommy left her heel on the floor. That’ll teach her to never leave me.”
I left my black heels on the floor after getting back from a night out, during which we had to put the dog in his crate for a little longer than usual. I woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of chomping, and saw immediately that he had chomped all the black off the heel of the shoe. I can only assume that he thinks this will keep me home next time.
We all have issues
While my family was at church, I pooped on the trampoline and rolled in it for good measure. They’ll think twice about going to church without me.
Our English Springer Spaniel loves to eat my daughter’s lip balm. And not just any lip balm will do. She only eats Eos lip balm. This week alone, she’s eaten three tubes of it.
14 years he’s had this belt. I chewed thru it in 5 minutes.
Zoe likes to steal the hoof trimmings from the farrier while he trims my horses feet. Zoe loves them but her tummy doesn’t, it likes to make sure we both know it’s mad.
I managed to open the lazy Susan & eat a whole loaf of bread, 4 burger buns, beef jerky & some meat sticks all while wearing this cone on my head!
Too many donuts
Teddy farted so many times I had to leave the room numerous times.
I pulled Mom into a parked car, breaking one of her ribs. In my defense, the cat I was chasing started it. — Darmit
P.S. Happy New Year, Mom!
