I fart every time I stretch to look out the window. My mom calls it “dog yoga”.
I Fart in Your General Direction
Posts By: Audra Williams
Predictive Text? Try Predictive Bark.
I am such a clever dog. I recognize the music from any advert with cat dog, bear, tiger, wolf etc etc. I bark explosively as soon as the music starts, even before the dog/cat appears. I am obsessed.
I Wanted to Stay in Contact!
Teething is getting expensive.
Why are you Stair-ing at me Like That?
I EAT STAIRS
We Only eat Organic
I was babysitting the neighbour’s hunting dogs while they went to Vegas. They got bored and I had to hide the evidence.
Table Manners
Meg had recently been under the weather and lost her appetite. Seems it is back. She had finished her dinner and while we were out getting ours, she pulled a canvas bag off of a chair, emptied it, ripped a hole in a plastic bag and then the plastic wrap. She scattered pieces of cracker through the house maybe to make sure she could find her way back to the office.
Sink or Swim
Nearly drown myself and mother chasing ducks instead of the ball!!!!
I Thought it was a Grocery List til I got to the Last Item…
This week I ate:
a retainer
a bag of Doritos
a bag of trail mix
a popsicle stick
a bag of almonds
& cat poop.
Cake-Cutting Fee
I suppose it was our own fault for leaving it on the kitchen table in a box behind two closed doors.
Pillsbury Dog Boy
“I ate flour then drank water. Not only were my whiskers stuck together, I also left dough pawprints on the carpet.” – Blaze
