I spent two days frantically looking for my chequebook. She did not chew it up, not a mark on it, guess she was going shopping.
Embezzlement will get you 5-10 (IN DOG YEARS??!!)

I spent two days frantically looking for my chequebook. She did not chew it up, not a mark on it, guess she was going shopping.
Hi. My name is minion and I have stinky room clearing gas.
“Yes Mom, I am IN my bed!”
Simon took “getting in bed” a little too literal. Time to buy yet another new pet bed for him!
I won’t eat my dog food because I know there’s leftover turkey in the ‘fridge.
I peed on my brothers head while he was smelling something on the ground…and as if that weren’t bad enough….he had to get a bath!!! Hee hee
2 days before my 60th birthday party, my lovely Daisy decided on a hearty meal of my party shoes.
“I’m sorry, did you want to sit here?”
Sometimes Simon gets a little chilly, but the inside of the couch cushion is toasty!
Dad thought I was ready to be left alone, Mom did not. Mom was right! (But that shoe sure tasted great!)
Everyone always told us that Basenjis were escape artists… and its true!
I stole another puppy’s ball at the park that was smaller than mine and decided it tasted good, so I swallowed it…